Clash of the Rival Robots Page 4

  “WE WILL OBEY,” the two Electrical Soldiers said.

  “Don’t hurt Twitter,” screamed Pendle.

  “He’s a machine,” snapped Mr Swift. “Machines don’t feel pain. They don’t feel joy. They don’t feel anything.”

  “I don’t know about that,” said Gadge. “I feel pretty fed up right now.”

  “I know exactly how you feel,” said Captain Clockheart. “And I feel like sorting this mess out.” He swung his legs back then rocked forward and kicked the chain attached to the cage that had held Twitter. It hit Mr Swift and sent him reeling. As he tripped, he released Twitter, who flapped his wings and flew out of reach.

  “Quickly now, Twitter! The locks!” yelled Captain Clockheart.

  “Electrical Soldiers, destroy them. Destroy them all,” ordered Mr Swift, as he scrambled to his feet.

  “WE WILL OBEY,” replied the soldiers.

  Tesla pushed Pendle out of his way then joined Faraday in taking aim and firing at the pirates.

  “Noooooo!”

  Pendle screamed, but she was helpless to stop Tesla and Faraday firing at the Steampunk Pirates. The sound and smell of the shots filled the huge room then silence followed, as the smoke drifted from the gun barrels. When the air cleared, Pendle saw that the Steampunk Pirates were no longer hanging from the ceiling. She looked down to see them standing with their handcuffs at their feet.

  “Picked the locks!” squawked Twitter. “Picked the locks!”

  “Good work, Twitter,” said Captain Clockheart, brushing himself down.

  “Aye, thanks,” said Gadge.

  “That was too close for comfort!” said Lexi.

  “Too close for comfort.” Twitter flew around in a circle then nose-dived to the ground.

  “Twitter!” Pendle ran to catch the parrot and saw that, although the soldiers had missed the pirates, two stray bullets had left gaping holes in Twitter’s wings. “You’ll pay for this, Swift.”

  “No, I won’t. You will. Tesla and Faraday, what are you waiting for?”

  “WE WILL OBEY.” Tesla and Faraday extended their swords then swished them through the air in a showy demonstration of their skills.

  “Argh, it’ll take more than this pair of overgrown pencil sharpeners to stop us.”

  Captain Clockheart drew his cutlass while Gadge selected a jagged blade with a curved edge.

  “Surely we can resolve this without resorting to violence,” said Lexi nervously.

  “Where would the fun be in that?” asked Captain Clockheart.

  “Besides, they shot our parrot,” said Gadge.

  “Attack them!” cried Mr Swift.

  “WE WILL OBEY,” said the soldiers.

  Faraday lunged. Gadge dodged and retaliated, but when his blade connected with his opponent’s, it snapped in two. Gadge quickly selected another sword attachment. He swung at Faraday’s legs and hit his target, but his opponent remained on his feet, unfazed by the attack.

  “You see, Faraday and Tesla were specially designed for warfare … unlike you servants,” said Mr Swift.

  “He’s right, Captain,” said Lexi, cowering in a corner. “We were not designed to fight.”

  Captain Clockheart ducked to avoid another attack from Tesla then elbowed him in the stomach. He caught the Electrical Soldier off guard and forced him to step back. “That may be, but we chose to fight.”

  “Och, exactly,” said Gadge. “We’ve had to adapt.”

  “To adapt, to change … to evolve.” Lexi’s word-wheel spun around.

  Gadge selected a mini-cannon and fired right into Faraday’s chest. Although the cannonball bounced off, it kept Faraday staggering back long enough for Clockheart to stick his leg out and trip him up. Faraday stumbled and collided with Tesla.

  “You think you’re so clever, but don’t forget – I created you,” said Mr Swift. “Nothing you can do will surprise me. Now, Tesla and Faraday, stop toying with them. Shut down these faulty machines.”

  “WE WILL OBEY.”

  This time, both soldiers swung their swords with such determination and power that sparks flew. They clashed with Captain Clockheart and Gadge, and drove them into the corner of the workshop.

  “Lexi, you have to help them!” said Pendle.

  “Oh, very well,” said Lexi. “For the Leaky Battery!” He charged forward with his sword raised high but Tesla reached out his arm and knocked him off his feet. “I feel dizzy … sick … embarrassed…” said Lexi.

  “This isn’t fair!” shouted Pendle.

  “What has fair got to do with anything?” replied Mr Swift.

  The soldiers stood with all three pirates before them. They raised their blades in preparation for the final blow.

  “Even if you destroy us, Swift,” said Captain Clockheart, “there is a ship full of pirates out there and every last one will want their revenge. These two walking lamp posts won’t be able to protect you when the rest of our crew come for you.”

  Mr Swift looked at Clockheart. “You are quite right, of course. Luckily there are plenty more where these came from.” He pulled a lever and a door opened in each of the chimneys. From every one emerged a soldier.

  Sixteen identical Electrical Soldiers stood to attention.

  “Now, my electrical army, finish this!” said Mr Swift.

  “WE WILL OBEY.” The soldiers loaded their barrels and raised their rifles.

  “Please don’t shoot! I don’t want to die!” said Lexi nervously.

  “You won’t,” said Pendle. “As long as you remember where the door is.”

  “Remember where what door is?” said Lexi, confused.

  “The one that gets you out.”

  Pendle suddenly ran over and flicked the huge light switch, thrusting them into darkness.

  “Don’t let them escape!” yelled Mr Swift.

  “WE WILL OBEY,” said the roomful of metal men.

  However, with no light, the soldiers were unable to see their targets. As they attempted to stop the prisoners from escaping, they crashed into each other. By the time Mr Swift had turned the lights back on, he had several bruises and the Steampunk Pirates had vanished.

  “All of you, after them!” he yelled.

  “WE WILL OBEY,” responded his Electrical Soldiers. They all walked towards the door at once. Three of them got stuck in the doorframe, blocking the others and leaving Mr Swift trapped inside.

  “Stand back, stand back!” he cried.

  “WE WILL OBEY,” they said, but this time they tripped over each other in their hurry to get out of his way.

  “Right, that’s it, you useless lot,” said Mr Swift. “If you don’t want to find yourselves melted down and turned into spare parts for Mr Stephenson’s rocket, you’ll stop messing about and destroy the Steampunk Pirates.”

  Pendle slipped out of Mr Swift’s workshop, clutching Twitter, with Captain Clockheart, Gadge and Lexi close behind.

  “Ha! To think, we came to rescue you,” said Captain Clockheart. “And you’ve ended up rescuing us.”

  “Why are we running away?” said Gadge. “I’d rather a fair fight any day.”

  “A fair fight?” said Lexi, “There were eighteen of those mindless killing machines.”

  “He’s right,” said Pendle. “We need to draw Swift out and fight him on our own terms.”

  “What terms are they?” asked Gadge.

  “We’re pirates, aren’t we?” said Pendle. “We fight on the water!”

  They stepped on to the jetty. Pendle jumped into the rowing boat and sat Twitter next to Ridgey, who was wriggling to get free of the ropes.

  “Quickly,” she said. “They won’t be far behind.”

  “Surely Mr Swift’s boat would be faster,” said Lexi.

  “Yes, but Swift wouldn’t be able to fit all of his soldiers in this one,” replied Pendle. “And we need him to follow with all of them.”

  “I’m sorry,” said Lexi. “Are you telling me that we want to be pursued by an army of fanatical fight
ing machines?”

  “Argh, Lexi, you worrying water-guzzler, stop arguing and get in. Pendle clearly has a plan.” Captain Clockheart booted Lexi into the boat then joined him. Gadge pushed them out then rowed with all his might.

  On the riverbank, a line of Electrical Soldiers aimed their rifles.

  “Incoming!” yelled Pendle.

  The soldiers fired.

  If Gadge hadn’t changed direction at the last minute, the bullets would have sunk them in a second. Thankfully, every one missed and by the time the soldiers had reloaded, they were out of range.

  “Good work,” said Captain Clockheart. “Now, Pendle, what’s your plan?”

  “Ridgey is going to help us defeat Mr Swift for good.” Pendle untied Ridgey’s beak. “Aren’t you?”

  “Why would I do that?” asked Ridgey.

  “Because Swift has no further use for you,” said Pendle. “He only made you for one reason.”

  “Aye. To betray us,” said Gadge.

  “Traitor bird!” said Twitter. “Traitor bird!”

  “He’s right,” added Lexi. “Treachery is in his nature.”

  “Exactly,” said Pendle. “And now it’s his turn to betray the man who made him so treacherous in the first place! What do you say, Ridgey?”

  After a moment’s thought, Ridgey said, “I’ll tell you what. I’ll do it for a cut of the loot.”

  “You mean the loot you used as bait to lure us into a trap?” said Captain Clockheart.

  “Please, Captain,” said Pendle. “We need him.”

  “Oh, all right.” Clockheart grinned. “You’ll get your share once this is over and we’re safely away.”

  “Then you’ve got yourself a deal,” said Ridgey. “What do you want me to do?”

  “Take a message to the Leaky Battery,” said Pendle.

  “If it’s still here,” said Captain Clockheart, looking at the sky.

  Further down the river, the rest of the pirates gathered on deck to watch the sun rise over London’s skyline, burning away the night fog.

  “Click, that’s it. Weigh the anchor!” Mainspring addressed the crew from the poop deck. “Tick, this ship be under my command now. Tock, let’s be away, you rusting ragamuffins.”

  “But Captain First Mate Mainspring, sir,” said Loose-screw. “What about the captain?”

  “Don’t forget Quartermaster Lexi, Mr Gadge, Pendle and Twitter,” said Hatchet. “They’re out there, too.”

  “Click, you all heard the captain’s orders,” said Mainspring. “Tick, we’re to set sail at sunrise.”

  “You said you were the captain now, so you did, Captain First Mate Mainspring,” said Tin-pot Paddy.

  “Tock, yes I am.”

  “Well, if you’re the captain you can give us new orders that don’t involve abandoning our shipmates,” continued Paddy.

  “Click, as captain it is my job to keep my crew safe. With no fog to hide us we’re sitting ducks here. Tick, it’s only a matter of time before the army get wind of our presence. We’ve got the booty from the Tower. I say we take it as far from here as possible. Tock, now, do as you’re told and let’s go.”

  The crew stared at him. No one moved.

  “Click, what are you waiting for?” yelled Mainspring.

  “We’re not going,” said Washer Williams. “We’re waiting for the others. We don’t care how dangerous it is. Steampunk Pirates stand together or sink together.”

  The other crew members muttered their agreement.

  “Cuh-cuh-cuh-click,” First Mate Mainspring snarled in anger. He clenched his fists and shook his head. “Click, I don’t understand. Tick, I’ve never once heard any of you question Captain Clockheart’s orders, no matter how dangerous or ill-judged his schemes. That’s what you do, follow orders. Tock, why won’t you follow mine?”

  “I’m begging your pardon, Captain First Mate Mainspring,” said Blind Bob Bolt, “but on the day we abandoned our posts at the palace, we stopped following orders blindly.”

  “Aye, we follow Clockheart’s orders because we choose to,” said Mr Pumps.

  “It’s true, so it is,” said Tin-pot Paddy. “That’s why we ain’t leaving.”

  “Click, very well, then we’ll all sit here. Tick, until the Iron Duke lines his cannons along the riverbank and blows us out of the water. Tock, see if I care!”

  Mainspring stormed off the deck and down into the captain’s cabin, where he paced back and forth furiously, wringing his hands and ticking extremely loudly until there was a knock on the door.

  “Click, what is it?” he barked.

  The door opened and Old Tinder wheeled himself in. “Captain First Mate Mainspring,” he said.

  “Tick, yes?”

  “You know that every last one of these rusting sea cogs believes you to be a first rate First Mate. When there’s looting and pillaging to be done, no one gets everyone organized and shipshape like you. And one day you’ll make an excellent captain, but you’ll need to learn to give commands that the crew want to follow.”

  “Tock, what’s the point of giving commands if they want to follow them?”

  “With respect, Captain First Mate Mainspring, they’re the only commands worth giving.”

  “Yo ho, down below!” yelled Blower from the crow’s nest. “Incoming albatross! Incoming albatross!”

  Old Tinder grinned. “What do you say? Are you ready to take command of this crew?”

  Mainspring drew his cutlass and nodded. “Click, right, you big bags of bolts. Tick, you oily-blooded buccaneers. Tock, let’s find out what this bird has to say for himself.”

  Once all eighteen Electrical Soldiers were loaded inside the paddle steamer, Mr Swift cranked up the speed. With the weight of all that metal, the boat floated low in the river and water splashed up from the paddle wheels.

  They had reached Tower Bridge when they caught up with Clockheart. The Leaky Battery was on the other side of the bridge, awaiting its captain’s return. Swift smiled to himself. He would sink the lot of them right here in the city where he had created them.

  As he drew closer, he cut the engine and allowed the river’s current to carry his paddle steamer under the bridge.

  “Electrical Soldiers, prepare to fire,” said Mr Swift, drifting alongside the rowing boat.

  “WE WILL OBEY,” replied the soldiers.

  “Answer me honestly now,” said Captain Clockheart. “Don’t you get tired of hearing that?”

  “No,” replied Mr Swift. “I like my machines obedient and predictable.”

  “Shame about us lot, then,” said Gadge.

  Mr Swift waved his hand dismissively. “Oh, it’s true that you’re disobedient, but your actions hold no surprises for me – I’m your creator.”

  “Surprise…” Lexi’s word-wheel clicked and turned. “An unexpected incident … a shock.”

  “You see,” said Mr Swift. “I knew you would say that. I made every part of you. I know you better than you know yourselves.”

  “You didn’t make me,” said Pendle. “And have I got a surprise for you! Now!” she yelled.

  Mr Swift did look rather surprised by what happened next. Something heavy and metallic landed on his head.

  “Click, sorry to drop in uninvited like this,” said First Mate Mainspring. “Tick, now let’s show these robotic rapscallions how real machines fight. Tock, Steampunk Pirates, plunder this ship with all you’ve got!”

  The rest of the crew followed their first mate and dropped down from the side of the bridge where they had been hiding.

  “Destroy them!” yelled Mr Swift.

  “WE WILL OBEY,” replied the Electrical Soldiers, launching themselves into battle.

  Hatchet fought with a sword in each hand. Washer Williams jumped on to one of the soldier’s backs and Loose-screw charged at three more. All around, pirates fought bravely against their enemies. Mainspring held out his hand and lifted Captain Clockheart up on to the enemy boat.

  “Thank you, Mainspring,” sa
id Captain Clockheart. “And thank you for not leaving at sunrise.”

  “You should have fled while you had the chance,” said Mr Swift. “I keep telling you, there’s no point fighting. You’ve already seen how much better my new designs are.”

  “They are stronger,” admitted Captain Clockheart. “Shinier, too. But not as good company, I’d wager.”

  “Och, they only know three words,” said Gadge, helping Pendle climb aboard.

  “It’s time someone taught them some new ones,” said Pendle.

  “Who would teach them?” said Mr Swift. “A runaway cabin boy?”

  “No. A runaway cabin boy’s pet parrot.”

  “The parrot’s been shot,” scoffed Mr Swift. “And a bird with no wings is no bird at all.”

  “That’s not true, strictly speaking,” said Lexi.

  “Do what you want!” squawked Twitter. “Not what you’re told!”

  Mr Swift looked up and saw Ridgey fly overhead, carrying the parrot. The mechanical albatross was taking Twitter from soldier to soldier, hovering above each head just long enough to give him time to fiddle with the wiring.

  “Coleridge,” yelled Mr Swift furiously. “I command you to drop that bird at once!”

  “Sorry, mate. No can do,” replied Ridgey. “I ain’t on your side no more. I’m on me own side now.”

  “Tesla, Faraday, and the rest of you… Shoot these flying fiends down!”

  “Don’t they say that shooting an albatross is unlucky?” said Gadge.

  “Superstitious nonsense. Blast them out of the sky … NOW!”

  The soldiers turned to look at Mr Swift, who had gone bright red with rage. Slowly but purposefully they lowered their rifles and stood to attention.

  “WE WILL NOT OBEY,” they said in unison.

  “Aha, a new word,” cried Captain Clockheart. “Only one, but a good one, to be sure. Victory is ours, lads.”